- Scantily clad attractive French women
- Rampaging death machines
- Angry neighbors
- Aforementioned rampaging death machines flying thru windows
- Aforementioned angry neighbors making unscheduled angry visitations
- Successful sales meetings in distant cities
- The inside world of Museums and Art Galleries
- Your favorite Pirata and/or Pirata Personality
- Copyright infringement and/or plagiarism
This story has all of these things and more.
But, wait that's not all!
If you read now you can also purchase one of these:
The shirt is for sale. (You're a weirdo and I'm concerned that you even thought that.)
But also possibly the man and definitely the beer (or one like it.)
It's a bargain bonanza, folks!
You'd be crazy NOT to buy!!!
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Thursday, September 27, 2012
This dog is on probation.
Although you can't tell from these pictures, Mike is in big trouble this morning.
Last night, apparently fed up with spending the day alone whilst I was in Chicago for a meeting with the good folks at The Art Institute and despite the best efforts of "The Source of the Trouble", The 29, the landlord, and Neighbor Fred to keep him company, this animal decided to take himself over to across the street for a little visit with the attractive French woman who lives there.
Twice.
But this was only accomplished after he went thru the window.
Twice.
Once thru the bedroom window.
And, once thru the living room window.
So when I got home at 10:00 last night, Neighbor Fred was sitting on the couch looking all stern and serious and concerned about how MY DOG had escaped on 2 SEPARATE OCCASIONS and caused quite a stir here in the neighborhood, roaming hither and yon, all willy-nilly, and how the tall, thin, blonde, French lady across the street had come to Fred's house for help, in the dark of night, wearing only a black, silk nighty, all dewey with a sheen of sweat glistening on her heaving bosom, because MY DOG had gone to her house AGAIN, and Neighbor Fred was only gonna tolerate this tall, thin, blonde, in her black silk nighty, and her heaving bosoms banging away on his door, looking only for the consolation and consideration of strangers, in the dark of night, ten or twelve more times before he would really have to put a stop to this clearly unacceptable behavior.
Neighbor Fred is right and I am really sorry.
What man wants to deal with this sort of shenanigans?
There he was, trying to relax after spending several days in Boston whoopin' it up with friends. Just sitting there trying to watch America's Next Top Garbage Truck Driver and such, and the next thing you know a tall, thin, blonde woman with a thick French accent and heaving, glistening bosoms, all dewey in the moonlight and whatnot, is breathlessly calling your name.
I can see how that would get downright annoying and I'm surprised that both Mike and I weren't shot on sight.
I'm sure there's a red mark on our permanent records enshrined in some secret NSA filing cabinet.
But the point is, Mike is in really, REALLY big trouble.
I can't have dogs flying thru my windows at all hours of the night, even if the aforementioned dog comes home attached to dewey breasted French wom.......
Wait............
Never mind.
We're good.
Nothing to see here.
No, no. Problem solved.
(Good boy)
(Goooooooood Boy)
With many thanks to Stephen Wright:
"I bought a dog the other day. I named him Stay. It's fun to call him. "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing. He's an East German Shepherd."
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Also, apparently I have a big fan in India (just guessing by the name)!!!
Raju Sharma seems to have a fondness for re-posting my stuff under his name with the special benefit of lots of pop-up windows!
It's win all the way 'round!!!
It's a compliment of sorts and helps to explain why I have so many readers in India.
It's a compliment of sorts and helps to explain why I have so many readers in India.
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